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Monthly Archives: June 2014

Friday Night Conversation With Yinka!

True life stories from the hearts of Storm Waivers

The Power of Assumption

It is Friday night again. As am writing this, I am super tired, exhausted and overwhelmed, its been a very long and productive day at work,  but grateful for the courage to keep moving on.

I can’t contain my excitement, joy and apprehension! why?

(1) It’s the last Friday of the month- 6 more months to Christmas!

(2) I was given the opportunity to spend quality time with 2 beautiful minded people today – during training, during lunch break and at the close of work.  2 wonderful-inspirational people, they all carry  their scarred banner with pride, victory written on their valley entrance and full of testimonies enough to make me skip my last week continuation of Arianna’s story from the shelter.

(3) I have/am having all my favorite girls together for a “Bring Sexy Back outing” – well, literally – “Day out with the ladies!! – a time to exhale, do some real, deep, sister-to-sister talking over a movie/lunch/spa and also, the conception of a new book through real life presentation!

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So, for tonight, please bear with me, feel my aching back and blurry vision due to my high consumption of happy-me-stress dose and click on link below to watch video clip of “Silent Beats” ( my write up on it to follow later). Thanks. Much love.. ‘Yinka

 

 

 

http://www.yinkalawrence.com

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Collection of short stories – Chapter One

all of me

LOVE FOR SALE

Collection of short stories by #moving forward with Yinka

I quickened my pace as the clouds began to gather in the sky. Up to now, the sky had been postcard-perfect, but it was changing. The beautiful cocktail-blue shade was beginning to darken into gravel-grey. Large pillows of cloud were forming, blotting out the old-gold color of the sun. I got the first splatter of rain when I was halfway across the meadow. I took shelter under an old oak, hoping that I could see out the shower.

Droplets of moisture began to drip from the leaves. They were sprinkling onto the grass like a gardener’s hose. Then the rainfall became more intense. A wall of rain moved over the oak and the drops were drumming against the canopy.

So much rain was falling that the sound blurred into one long, whirring noise. It reminded me of the rotor blades on a helicopter. Eventually, the noise lessened and the drops faded into a musical chime. The sun came out again, casting slanted beams of light across the meadow. Steam rose slowly from the grass. It rose up eerily and drifted mist-like towards the molten-gold sun. The image was so vivid that it stayed with me all the way home.

I just can’t stop thinking about her! The lingering scent of stale orange peel on her silk scarf, the powerful commanding way the breeze sends it flying across the field as free as life could offer. This fragile yet alluring body running around happily under the …

To be continued!

Written by: ‘Yinka for Women Weave The World.

www.yinkalawrence.com

 

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We All Need A Push, A Positive One.

push 2

A mother eagle knows that if she waits for her young to get out of the nest and fly on their own initiative, it’ll never happen. So she pushes them out! That’s radical, but they learn to fly and fulfill their destiny.

When we set goals for ourselves at an early age, one of the greatest task ahead of us we take for granted is also setting up a method to discourage any form of obstruction, roadblocks or distractions along the way! Because surely it will come.

So, after finally meeting up with my publisher, He took a good spectacled look at me and my over-the-years -oh-so-long manuscript and smiled. Girl! It is time. Time to quench that thirst! The world is waiting for your story! It is time to launch it! Was I ready to let go? Probably not, because the story in us never ends – with each new day in our lives, it’s always a new beginning, a resounding awareness, hope arises, new characters are given birth to and old ones unfold.

To succeed in life we must sometimes stay within our strength zone to observe our qualities, but continually make constructive move outside our comfort zone to be able to observe, learn, study and eventually move forward.Have you ever accomplished anything of significance while you were in your comfort zone? Think about it. The answer is ‘no,’ isn’t it? We don’t like moving outside our comfort zone. We resist it. We like to feel safe and secure. We don’t want to look foolish or fall flat on our faces.

And as we get older we naturally tend to become more and more complacent. That’s a problem, because complacency kills passion. It reduces us to average. It clips our wings and keeps us from soaring, no matter how much we want to. It takes initiative to succeed at anything in life. It requires us to take risks.

Positive risk through “push” is aligning our passion with crazy faith. Connecting with the right crowd at the right time is very important. Passion prompts us to leave our comfort zone and cross the threshold of our doubt. It pushes us out the door, so that we can get going on the journey in life that God designed for us.

Hoping someone to push on their door of opportunity as opposed to knocking, to pray for divine connection to their greatness and lean not on their own understanding or the selfish zeal of hungry opportunist. So step out in faith, take the initiative, take the risk – Do it!

‘Yinka.

www.yinkalawrence.com

***Thanks Gregg.

 

 

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Friday Night Conversation with Yinka!

True life stories from Abused Teenagers and Women in Shelter.

So, it’s another Friday evening, I am super exhausted from bike riding with the kids! But, if you are reading this: You probably didn’t plan anything distinctive for tonight or you’re on your way out or to bed, or still deliberating on both. Whatever it is – Have you ever considered…

“Friday night at the Shelter? Dinner, Bingo, Movie and a lot of real life” D-R-A-M-A”

For us in the pews, testing ourselves must include deliberating about our vocations and whether we are called to missions, or to a life of dedicated service to the needy, or to creating reminders with art and culture of the gospel’s transcendent, everlasting hope.

Discovering a radical faith may mean revisiting the ways in which faith can take shape in the mundane; it almost certainly means embracing the providence of God in our witness to the world.

The Good Samaritan wasn’t a good neighbor because he moved to a poor part of town or put a pile of trash in his living room. He came across the helpless victim “as he traveled.” We begin to fulfill the command not when we do something radical, extreme, over the top, not when we’re really spiritual or really committed or really faithful, but when in the daily ebb and flow of life, in our corporate jobs, in our middle-class neighborhoods, on our trips to the mall or Disney World—and yes, even short-term mission trips—we stop to help those whom we meet in everyday life, reaching out in quiet, practical, and loving ways.

I volunteered to spend an evening with some teenagers undergoing psychotherapy evaluation from molestation and sex addiction in order to finish a book I was writing.

So, I met with Arianna at a shelter I was assigned to sometime ago. She just turned 16 and was excited about getting a new tattoo. Through our conversation and her open hysteria about my sing-tune accent, she’d mentioned being raped at ages: 9, 10 and 11…

(To be continued next week Friday)

www.yinkalawrence.com

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Book Club @ www.yinkalawrence.com

Hello Everyone,

I am excited to inform you that #Moving Forward With Yinka has moved to a new page,

titled: http://www.yinkalawrence.com

My Book Club/Blog Page is located at my new website.

Now reading… “Things We Lost In The Storm” (my collection of short stories)

Now reading…”Friday Night Conversation with Yinka” (true life stories from abused teenagers/ women in shelter)

Now reading…”Escape Lyrics” – Poems from the heart.

Now reading…”Bringing Sexy Back” – Rekindle the flame of love, sex and passion in your marriage and finding purpose to fulfil our desire to be valuable.

Hope to see you there!

Yinka.

BOOK CLUB AND NEW BLOG @ http://www.yinkalawrence.com

http://www.yinkalawrence.com

 

 

 

http://www.yinkalawrence.com

 

A Father’s Worth or A Father’s Hindrance?

father

Just for a moment, let’s celebrate all our earthly fathers! They come in different names: Daddy, Papa, Pere, Baba and Papi. They are casually unsung and too often seen as figure-heads, rather than Household-Heads! they are born with a long line of questionable characters that shows their various unique personalities. Not one of them is alike in their approach on life. But mostly all share the same title, no matter the extent of their flaws, they are still our Fathers: Marvelous or Lousy!

Today, its very heart breaking that about 40% of people I know, either doesn’t want to discuss their father, or have anything good or memorable to say or never had a good relationship with them. The only thing that binds is the last name. Period!

For years this notion made me feel very uncomfortable singing my own father’s praises, but really, it’s actually a blessing talking about him rather than covering his attributes. He’s had his fair share of challenges with life; he’s been through that dark and confusing tunnel and back, bruised and carries his scars with pride- back home to his family! 81 years and still holding on strong!

So, let me introduce my earthly father: Pa. Arthur! as christened by his parents, religiously called “Papami by his children and fondly called “Mr. Gansy” by me – and my childhood friends (whenever I/we needed a favor from him).  The connection between us is spellbound! We could sit down together for hours over newspapers and not talk – just basking in each other’s company, our silence – strange as it might be, sets a resounding trust of deep and sincere companionship. And when we do decide to talk, it is Absolute! ‘all about anything and everything! there wasn’t a secret between us. This grew into my teenage years and beyond and has positioned me for life. For whom I am today.

I grew up calling my father: “Papami” – a broken Portuguese term for Daddy! If there were any lingering beautiful memories of growing up – it was all with my father in the picture: Prize giving day at school, Long dreadful and dusty drive to boarding school, Saturday evening live jazz performance trips to Museum kitchen, Confusing and hectic  soccer game between Abiola Babes & Iwuanyanwu at Onikan stadium, Slow and careful drive to Bar beach filled with amusement and giggling, Excitement over dinner at Eko Hotel and planned touring with him to his sites at Maroko (now the exotic Lekki & VGC ), The pride of attending formal evening cocktail/dinners with him and his colleagues, having being taught simple table manners etiquette on the relevance, proper usage and placement of cutleries on plates before and after eating, (to show the host/cook appreciation on how pleasant or bad the food was) His emphasis on reading and writing anything that comes to mind down in my diary, rather than join the kids in the neighborhood to play ten-ten. Hmmm!

For me this is the good part I want to carry along with me. Not the devastating episodes of how society has labeled fathers. The role a father holds is irreplaceable. I have realized that fathers can be much more than physically absent. There is a desperate ache to be loved and supported and affirmed and encouraged by our fathers–all mandates from God. And when they are not, there is a wound formed. And this hurt runs deep in the hearts of children, young and old. Talking with older men, I realized how much their fathers have shaped who they are even today. We do not forget our families or where we came from, even if we want to.

But during this celebration of father’s day, I am trusting and believing with someone that there is hope for the wounded heart. God has promised us that he is our perfect father; the one our earthly father could never be. No longer does the fatherless have to be crippled in their condition. They can change their circumstances through finding their worth in Christ, break the cycle, and be fully present fathers to their children.

May God help us all!

Yinka

Like Billy Graham quoted:  A good father is one of the most unsung, upraised, unnoticed, and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society.

 

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Our Reflection in the Mirror, A tale of split images?

mirror

Look into the mirror, and the impression that jumps back at you is familiar. Why? Because it is expected. Even when we pretend like we never saw it coming. It is right there. It could be favorable or not so cool, but it will only show us an outward reflection of who we are. Mirrors don’t lie. They only show a part of truth. A broken mirror can enlarge a face up to a dimension of a small planet. The problem is how we handle the reflection we get. Are we really who we are seeing? Or what we want the world to see? Hmm.

Growing up in the Brazilian-Quarters of Lagos, among the many passed-down antiques from my grandparents was this beautiful crafted long standing mirror. It must have been about 6 feet tall with artisan crafted edges made with dark polished wood trimmings, the spiral-cursive finishing of the wood in resemblance to the Portuguese architectural arch molding on the house, splendid to touch which makes me wonder as a child, how many hours it took to build this mirror! That mirror was my greatest companion. In front of that mirror – I ruled the world with my singing and dancing, well that was decades ago!

Unlike any other furniture in our home, it stood alone, always in the center to create awareness for vain on-lookers, served as a meeting point for aunts and cousins to adjust their hats before leaving for Easter mass at the Cathedral, and also drag back any passerby who’s chosen to ignore its beauty. The mirror itself was a view to withhold. It carried volume in appearance. It sorrowfully departed the world through my Brother’s 1980’s-disco moves on his newly-acquired roller skate! ‘Love you still, Bros!

So, sometimes mirrors give us a false sense of confidence. The reflection that we see every day has nothing to do with how others see us. A crack in that glass and the reflection we get back is awkward and not very pleasant. This is just like our individual crack in life. What others sees about us that’s glamorous and appealing is exactly the cover page we worked hard to display. The secrets the mirror has is our before and after. Our true identity. Our natural image. Be it good or bad. It tells, If we are tender in our approach towards other people’s feeling? If we are judgmental? If we harbor hatred or love outwardly or buckled up with guilt, inwardly. If the words of our mouth blesses or discriminate? If our attitude is divinely appealing or just enviously-bad! Are we two-faced? Do we take other people’s feelings for granted? Do we even care, if our purpose of existence is in line with God’s plan? Even the mirror knows all about our split images, before the glass cracks.

Today, I am encouraging someone to stare right back at that mirror with a positive attitude. With all absolute human certainty that no one can really know their own beauty or perceive a sense of their own worth until it has been reflected back to them in the mirror of another loving, caring human being.

We all carry with us through life a mirror, as unique and impossible to get rid of as our shadow, and because we sometimes can’t see what’s right in front of us, because it’s behind us, we’re still looking into the past! Our God is like a mirror, Consistent, Stable, and Un-changing; He reflects His image of us even when we break the glass. He see us Clear, Crystal and Undimmed. Let’s bolster our attitude, so our image and reflection are connected.

May God help us all!
Yinka

“Your adornment must not be merely external – braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.”-I Peter 3:3&4

 

My salutation to a rare gem, Maya Angelou!

maya

May 28th 2014, the world lost a gem, a very rare one. But because I personally found my joy of writing in that rare gem, I have come to accept that, she’s not gone forever! In my heart and many other people who have come to value her worth of spoken and written words, her legacy lives on, her once crowded and dark cupboard with crooked legs, is now that priceless remedy, that soothing balm that heals and inspires, those expressive words: very deep, precise, real, cutting, profound, rooted and yearning. Even the most timid person can relate to her past, embrace her juicy livelihood and rise with her into the future.

Sometime ago while I was still in the University of Port Harcourt, studying English! For a presentation we were required to write an autobiography on a famous woman of our choice. Well, a non-existing one, I’d quickly picked Evita Peron and Lady Diana. Even though I wanted badly to write on Maya, but very well she was still very much existing, and her wellbeing was priority. And I remember, when I informed the lecturer then (Professor Helen Chukwuma, fondly known as ‘Madame” – currently a full Professor of English in Jackson State University, Mississippi, USA) and she’d smiled and urged me to go ahead with Evita instead. Her words were: “We all still need Maya alive” That was 18 years ago.

I read ‘I know why the caged bird sings” and was blown away by her deep expressive utterances of a broken past, that’s been written in such a way that allows the reader to travel back in time into their own childhood and feel the joy and pain mixed with reconciliation. A heavy pang of illusion overwhelmed me, and I just had to go back to the beginning to read it again – this time, capturing every alluring moment – till I got to the last paragraph: “She turned out the light and I patted my son’s body lightly and went back to sleep”. Compelling, captivating and easily approachable!

My favorite of her poems, Still I Rise! I know has really helped a lot of people going through some kind of difficult transition with life. We’d used this poem as a theme during shelter visitation with abused teenagers, for women going through counseling for some kind of battery or addiction and also during a group discussion to help boost self-esteem and self- confidence.

She will be greatly missed and has done her calling above and beyond with her strength and words that we shall never forget, there’s no pomp and pageantry about her, even without meeting her in person, you automatically connect with her personality, her words build and create freedom in breaking down barriers with whatever storms there may be. She has given herself as an example of a crushed seed, but not a destroyed sprout. She’s grown out of it by using her God given talent of “talking freely” to help inspire others. Her past is her testimony, her life’s work, a legacy for us all, and a force of humanity.

Today, I am encouraging someone to look beyond whatever bitter, twisted lies or dirt that has been written down about them in history, But still, like dust, “To Rise”

Just like moons and like suns, with the certainty of tides, Just like hopes springing high, Still to get up and… Rise.

May God Help us all
Yinka

 
 
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