hope

Are you SINGLE, SEARCHING & DIS-ENGAGED? This goes out to all the SINGLE LADIES out there…”You may be Broken, but you’re Not Bent” – Come learn how to LOVE again! @www.totalwomanmovement.com

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 4 Comments

5 MORE DAYS TO GO!!! (Excitement mode activated!)bent 3#TWC 3. 

If you are reading this and fall under that specific age where those sugar-coated tongue-guys are spreading their tentacles, making false deliveries of exaggerated non-existent fantasy-like promises! And suddenly, POOF! ‘They disappear into thin air! Oh no! ‘Whatever happened to those promises and aspirations?

Nothing to worry about! ‘Cos there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you, babes! But everything amiss with that man who’s taking you for granted! Or you’ve been through a series of roller coaster-kind of relationships for a while and now given up on going into another one! But really, who wouldn’t crawl back into their shell to regain their sanity after such emotional distress?

You look at your image in the mirror, and what you see is a beautiful well-formed, strong and dynamic lady! Even those around pass glowing compliments! Oh goodness! What do you see? The type of girl any sensible guy would gladly take home to Momma! And dance jubilantly to the altar…pink 1

‘But you just keep wondering… ‘When will it be my turn? NOW LISTEN CAREFULLY!!

You may be broken, due to certain circumstances, but also you need to understand that there can’t be any healing without first being broken. Come figure out how to start the healing process, let’s put the pieces back together just like the “potter” would, aligning the fragments in such a way that when the “bond” (the healing, fragrant balm is added) you have a splendidly well-put together piece that will speak volumes of what was shrouded in that brokenness.

What are you waiting for? Come join other singles as we gather around seasoned speakersspring 3 like The Mercados, Rev. Adetuberu, Terri Matthews and more… Come learn how to set realistic goals in building strong relationships! Come join us as we listen to teachings on how to apply Godly principles while waiting. Together, we can learn to understand that just as you are not perfect, there is no perfect guy out there, but dare I say, there is a guy out there who loves all your perfect imperfections, accepting you just the way you are!

Need more information? Visit www.totalwomanmovement.com  to be plugged into the movement that will Heal, Enlighten, Liberate and Position you for a better tomorrow!

Yours in HOPE,

Yinka.

***WATCH OUT for #TWC 4 “Are you GOLDEN, MATURED & SEASONED? –‘Here’s a glimpse of what to expect at the upcoming TOTAL WOMAN CONFERENCE! (For the Graciously Ripe and Germane OLDER ADULTS @ 55+.

 

 

As we count down the days to the TOTAL WOMAN CONFERENCE: Here are snippets of topics to expect!

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / Leave a comment

#TWC 1 – Let’s Get It On – Bedroom Talks!

 Hello Ladies!

Aha! It is exactly 12 days to the much anticipated women only retreat! “FRAGRANCE 216 – TOTAL WOMAN CONFERENCE”spring 3

Hooray!! Can you feel my excitement?? I’m catching the whiff of spring with its alluring effusion of an assortment of fragrances… (Hyacinths, Daffodils and Tulips – my favorite!) spring 1

I am even more awakened by the thoughts of the blessings and enlightenment that am expecting from the speakers… ’What about you?

Oh! Do you know there’s going to be real life sex talk? (Giggles) and “Girl Power talk by Renowned, motivational speaker Terri Matthews on “Common on Sister, Let’s Be Real!

Oh yeah! And other topics like…”Let’s talk about our sexual lives” “Why we are not getting it on? The frigidity, fear, pain, tiredness, loss of interest, Erectile Dysfunction, Premature Ejaculation. Yes! I said it all.Because this is for real!shutterstock_34411321

‘Like SERIOUSLY? “Is this a Christian retreat? Oh yes. It is. And it’s time for us to deal with real issues that affect our fulfilment or that make us vulnerable. Why do we shy away from discussing our intimate desires and pretend there’s no problem with our sex life? It affects a healthy relationship and turns intimacy into a war room of deprivation or lost ego when sexual needs are not met. It’s time to learn more about the solution.

Sign up now at:  www.totalwomanconference.com  to be plugged into the movement that will Heal, Enlighten, Liberate and Position you for a better tomorrow!

Yours in HOPE,

Yinka.

***WATCH OUT for #TWC 2 “What’s in this movement for me, I’m just a YOUNG ADULT! (Love’s Game, ‘Want to Play?)

 

How aware are you about ‘AUTISM’?

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 17 Comments

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Today April 2nd, is World Autism Awareness Day. Although we know so much more about autism than we did twenty or thirty years ago, it is still very important for all of us to make sure we know some facts and are able to debunk the myths about autism.

As an Applied  Behavioral Analyst with a  deep passion for children with autism, I am joining the rest of the world in wearing blue #LIUB and campaigning for a cause I believe in!

But today is about so much more than tweets and t-shirts. People like my childhood friend, Oyin! My cousin Sammy! and so many others who are on the autism spectrum, live with it every single day — we can’t stop showing our support when the blue lights go out.aut 5

Awareness is the first step to making true progress. With a loud enough megaphone, supported by your voice, we can convince lawmakers to fund more research for innovative treatments and resources for students on the spectrum who need a little extra support to keep up with their peers.

We can keep mapping the human genome to gain greater understanding of the many forms of autism and develop personalized treatments. We can educate more parents about the signs of autism to increase the rate of early diagnosis — and then connect them with the resources they need to help their child lead a happy and healthy life.

Here are 10 good reasons we should care about AUTISM:

Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is a developmental disability that can cause significant social, communication and behavioral challenges. There is often nothing about how people with ASD look that sets them apart from other people, but people with ASD may communicate, interact, behave, and learn in ways that are different from most other people. The learning, thinking, and problem-solving abilities of people with ASD can range from gifted to severely challenged. Some people with ASD need a lot of help in their daily lives; others need less.aut 3aut 2A diagnosis of ASD now includes several conditions that used to be diagnosed separately: autistic disorder, pervasive developmental disorder not otherwise specified (PDD-NOS), and Asperger syndrome. These conditions are now all called autism spectrum disorder.

  1. About 700,000 people alone in UK are on the autism spectrum and with their families they make up around 2.8 million people whose lives are affected by autism on a daily basis according to the National Autistic Society. While about 36,500 of every 4 million children born each year in the United States will have autism.
  2. The number of people diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) has dramatically increased over the last few years. Today it’s estimated that one child in 68 has ASD. This means in a secondary school of 1500 students about 15 of them will be autistic.
  3. Being diagnosed as autistic isn’t a label or something negative – it can mean the difference between growing up in a confusing, scary world and getting all the right support and services. It also gives parents an explanation for difficulties their child is having. Adults can be diagnosed with autism as well.use1
  4. People with autism have a unique take on the world that can be fun, enlightening, entertaining and thought-provoking. They encourage us to see the value of sounds, smells, places and objects that may otherwise pass us by.
  5. Chances are most people will know or be related to someone with autism making it vital that they understand something about what autism is and how they can adapt their world to make it more autism-friendly.
  6. Autism is an invisible disability. That they could have extreme difficulties with sensory processing and social understanding and interaction is not immediately apparent.
  7. Every individual with autism have their own unique version of autism. There are many myths and assumptions, but if you’ve met one person with autism … you’ve met one person with autism.aut 4
  8. That kid in the supermarket having a tantrum might just be a child so overloaded with sights, smells and sounds that the fear and stress has led to a meltdown. Think twice before judging: many parents are fighting battles like these every day and need your understanding and support.
  9. Autistic traits have had a clear benefit to human development, and can affect the emotional well-being of the caretaker – Reach out to a family in need today!
  10. Finally, I would like everyone reading this to show support within their natural environment by volunteering to learn coping strategies – Sunday schools! Camps, or even within your community! And my prayer is that, eventually they will grow up in a world that understands and embraces their difference … shortcomings and all.

***Dedicated to all my 240 adorable Autism community children & families, to the ones we have lost due to late intervention or mis-diagnosis and to all the early intervention/behavioral therapists who have dedicated their lives to serve them. Thank you.

Yours in HOPE as I #LightItUpBlue for Autism Awareness this month!

Yinka.

Are we comfortably numb in our denial? ‘Time to speak up on ABUSE!

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 10 Comments

Connecting with “The Total Woman Movement” – A Refuge of Comfort in Brokenness.

I once attended a sorority party about 2000 miles away from my college in 1992. Our Destination: University of Calabar! Excitement mode activated! Trust me, I had carefully packed away my popular orange halter-neck dress, with matching brown lace up mules, and my hairstyle? Aha! I’d travelled all the way to Onne villa (outside Port Harcourt) just to patronize the best hair braider in the whole of Rivers state! Phew! Such youthful exuberance! Silly painful vanity!abuse 7

Halfway through the journey, I began to feel feverish and tired! Oh no! It can’t be happening to me… I was aching all over, ah!  It must be M-a-l-a-r-i-a! Oh great! How can this be happening to me? I had so prepared for this day! This wasn’t in the plan!

My temperature was spiking, this fever has no respect for my opinion! In fact, ‘it has come to stay like a desperate housewife! My travelling team was terrified! “How can it be (I was getting helpless).

Anyway, without much ado, as if that fever was a red flag, the party was cancelled due to serious vigilante watch as opposing rival confraternities were in the midst of a serious war. We all spent the night off campus, in a rented hostel.abuse 3

Six other girls and I shared 2 adjacent rooms. It was a night I will never forget. Amongst being confined inside our rooms, noises of gunshots blasting throughout the night, as we became more frightened we looked to each other for support.

In the middle of nowhere, we became each other’s trusted companion, well, we had no choice but to wait and see what the morning brings forth.abuse 4

The fear and helplessness we felt that night brought back horrific memories of abusive pasts, stories of years of abusive upbringing, relationships and stolen childhood. Storylines that 7 beautiful, intelligent and oh-so-cool girls have never dared to talk about!

Tales that have been buried for years with those clicking fancy bangles, baggy Pepe jeans, colorful trendy t-shirts, shining pink lip gloss and fake make-believe smiles! oh boy! Did we vent!

“Ah, I was molested by my neighbor when I was 10!’ “I couldn’t tell anyone”

‘I was raped by my uncle when I was 12, I’d wanted to commit suicide”

“ I was never touched, but told constantly that I was ugly and a weakling”  

“ My mother’s boyfriend was very aggressive, he would beat me up and rape me, I couldn’t tell anyone, I was too frightened”

“I was betrayed by a senior in school, she raped me, I can’t trust anyone anymore”

 “I watched my father beat up my mother for years” “He told us he loved us, but couldn’t stop hurting us” “His anger was uncontrollable”

“I was raped inside my house” “I was ganged raped and molested at a party on campus” 

and on and on and on…we all talked into the early hours of the next day…sleep eluding our consciousness…and we were never the same after that day…forsaking the beauty that material things have managed to conceal, our hearts were on fire!abuse 6

Party forgotten and ignored, we had released everything no one had ever inquired of us… or the story our culture forbids by acceptance or utterance! we released the dark secrets that harbors lingering pain! ‘the substance of our current day frustrations and rejections…’stories we could not confess to priests during penance…or even during deliverance…’stories that family traditions sweeps under the carpet as generation to come wallow in confusion…’these were stories hidden in misery and denial…but, we had to travel all the way out of town, be confided into a hostel with bullets flying outside our windows….just for those stories to surface. We all had closure after confiding and crying out about it and promised to seek help after. The burden is now shared, not to be chastised or reprimanded, but to begin healing and moving forward.

Ok…that was 24 years ago! I have lived past those stories, but currently still living amongst those who are unable to talk about their story…’Abuse stories or even use their experiences to help raise awareness and help someone going through it.

What’s your Abuse story? Broken dreams or failed relationship? Or what’s that Abusive storyline you played a part in? years ago, that is still lingering and haunting you presently? You know why it’s still trailing after you. But to get closure to it, someone else somewhere right now is going through the same ABUSE you encountered…and the circle is continual UNTIL you Seek help, Campaign against it! Create a platform for awareness!abuse 1

Let’s celebrate a season of closure and recovery…’like when a heavy burden has just been off-loaded from our shoulders. A sense of commitment and togetherness…like ‘Wow! I am not alone! I thought I was the only one!

Since that day, I have learned to respect and look at those ladies differently with respect and courage, for speaking up about their abusive past. And today, I am hoping our stories could save a life or two!  Or is it still happening?

So, if you are reading this, ask yourself…’Does my fragrance (that beautiful perfect-picture image, I carry with me effortlessly) have fragments (stains, shame, sorrow, abusive stories)? Am I really truthful to myself? Am I still hiding behind the veil of pretense and still hoping that one day I would wake up and say “It never happened” – Ah! If you are reading this and have ever encountered any form of abuse (sexual, verbal, physical or emotional) – don’t let it define you. When we talk about some of our stories, it helps someone else going through it or someone who’s gone through it and still struggling with acceptance of the shame of the aftermath.abuse 5

Our fragrance did have fragments! And it was time to break it open, not to ridicule each other or laugh at each other but a time of total submission, after all, we were all skeptical we’ll make it out of that place, alive. But we did, and now, there’s a story to be told to help uplift someone going through something similar…our Alabaster Jar just got cracked, and the spill is totally healing and comforting, what do you think?

Are we even aware of the comfort in our brokenness? Do we know that refuge from our circumstances and contentment in the midst of mishaps is found in the center of our surrender. Or is it in our brokenness?

If that is true, then why are so many women still living lives with little or no joy based on their past? I’m afraid that we have bought the lies of the enemy (the abuser), allowing him/her to steal our joy. Discouragement, weariness, disillusionment, shattered dreams, and unrealized goals are some of his/her favorite weapons, but the truth is that the enemy can only use what we allow him/her to use, “Our destructive abused past”

It is time for us to reclaim surrendered ground. Do you sometimes think you are fighting the same old battles you have been fighting for so many years? I do. Clinging to familiar pain because we find our identity there. Consumed with our own agenda, while  our joy is buried under a mountain of self loathing.abuse 2

Today, there’s HOPE! There’s a better tomorrow and it can be brighter than the past, the abusive past! Join the movement that comforts the abused today. The Total Woman Movement. Come as you are (BROKEN) learn how to release your inner fragrance (STORY) and let the scents relieve your life’s dents. (HEALING).

For more information about this movement, please visit www.totalwomanmovement.com

Yours in HOPE as I share Gloria Estefan’s “Coming Out Of The Dark”

Yinka.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow…

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 9 Comments

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Here we go again! It’s another Valentine’s Day – FEB 14th.

I guess it’s another day for everyone who claims or pretends to be in love, falling in love, crazy about someone, or just a routine gesture of forced emotions to declare their un-solicited affection. It is indeed another season to pretentiously or sincerely spend money on un-wanted flowers (that eventually will wither and decay in the trash can), another reason to spend a little more on chocolates, expensive dinner and some humungous teddy bear that eventually becomes a hoarder’s delight.

Hmmm, don’t get me wrong! Am not against celebrating this much-ado-about everything event called Valentine’s Day! I think over the years I have gotten a fair share of my own fantasy and now so used to simply not waiting till Feb 14th to tell or show those around me how much I really do care about them!

Gone are the days when my girlfriends and I would just marvel in excitement and laugh out loud or calculate the cost of the goodies or the sizes of those spooky looking love-deprived teddy bears we used to receive then in our single-girl season…it’s so funny how naïve and ridiculous we were then (lol).love 3m

I mean like, ‘Oh, cos he gave me a huge teddy bear and boxes of assorted Cadbury chocolates….’Aha, he’s the perfect guy! Or “Oh no, He made me a custom-made gigantic valentine card (oh yes, that was the in-thing then, lol) – and the best part of it all was the drama behind the presentation of the card/teddy bear and chocolates! It’s like a young guy going to face a panel of decision makers regarding his future love life. (Lol). “Eh, please kindly accept this as a token of my love” the lover boy would say as beads of sweat gather on his now creased forehead, hair nicely combed back, shoe well-polished and shinning you could still smell the fresh shoe polish, hands trembling as his newly acquired packet shirt is all buttoned up and seems to be choking his neck” His Blue jeans perfume carrying on even after his disappearance. (Lol). Boy oh boy! Phew!

But today in history, where has all the luxury and comfort of romances gone to? Do people still even make those custom made cards, carved out with the letters of the recipient’s name or heart shape? With those long captivating poems that mesmerize and keep your heart dazzled in the awesomeness of fondness? Those things usually come delivered even days before Feb 14th, so by the time its Feb 14th, you are either in love with the sender, thinking about the sender or you are approaching a different route in discovering love elsewhere. Awww, good old memories.

Falling in love was made to be simple, direct and un-complicated.love 1m

Now it’s been replaced with non-tangible things, irrelevant platforms and advanced technology that causes friction and disability in true expression. Where has showing love gone to? Is this display of yearly affection guaranteed? What happens next valentine season? Will this love still be evident?

I will be moving past those memories, but lovingly taking every bit of lesson learned from them. Loving those I choose to love does not limit me to Feb 14th.  Showing my affection sincerely is a 365day- thing for me. Or even better, some days when I just feel compelled, connected and in tune with what deep affection has to offer me…

Hopefully, we all can genuinely celebrate today and tomorrow and the day after like we STILL are in the valentine-state-of-mind. That really, it’s not only about lovers and couples, but sincerely for everyone or anyone who’s made an impact in our lives, someone who’s touched us so deep inside that their marks leave good memories to cherish… for that someone who out of all the thousands you’ve ever loved, just stands out and truly understands you, for that friend who’s not even thinking of celebrating today because they don’t have a reason to, for that person you know grieving the loss of a dead loved one, for that single who’s wallowed with condemnation and rejection, for that heartbroken-used-to-be-in-love pal who’s given up on love. This is the moment, the time to reach out and hold their hands…or give them your audience.love 2m2

Hopefully, by the end of today, we can boldly say, ‘Hey! I will still love (be there for you) tomorrow and always. But, as for me, I will love you even better than today, if tomorrow comes. It’s a promise.

Yours in HOPE as I share James Durbin “Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow” (one of my favorite rendition).

Yinka.

 

 

 

Today is, ‘WORLD CANCER DAY!!

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 14 Comments

Today is World Cancer Day, a day that unites us all by recognizing the impact that cancer has on the worldwide community and our role in taking action to finish the fight.world 2

This year’s World Cancer Day theme, “We can. I can,” encourages us all to explore what we can do – individually and collectively – to reduce the global burden of cancer.

In 2012, over 1.6 million women worldwide were estimated to be diagnosed with new cases of cancer according to the American Cancer Society’s Global Cancer Facts and Figures, 3rd Edition. That statistic shows how critically important it is for us to rally together to ensure that no one will ever have to face this disease alone.less

My hope is that, even as you read this, you will consider taking time to reach out and encourage, uplift or show your support the best way you can.

And after today, when tomorrow comes, My hope is that you still consider reaching out to those closest to you that have been touched by cancer, and celebrate their life and the dedication you have to ensure no one else is touched by this disease or left alone.

world 3Whether it is someone who was recently diagnosed, someone who has been a survivor for decades, or someone who has lost a loved one to cancer, it is important to let them know that on World Cancer Day, your thoughts are with them.

Yours in HOPE. Together We can, I can.

Yinka – Team Greater Than Cancer.IMG_1450

For American Cancer Society

God of Broken Things by Wadza Mhute.

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / Leave a comment

I was having a discussion with my friend about therapy for Christians. My friend is seeing a therapist for work-related trauma but she had doubts about the process because she is a Christian. She moved passed initial misgivings once she started seeing a therapist and realized the need to speak to someone about her issues. Then a day later another Christian friend casually mentioned advice her therapist gave.broken 2

The message I was receiving from these seemingly random discussions was the need for me to look inward. It seems, at least to me, that once one receives Christ then the need for personal reflection takes a back seat and we are sometimes mired in religiosity and fail to understand ourselves. As Christians we speak to God through prayer and He speaks to us in many ways including through His word. In our prayer time, however, do we ask God to show us ourselves? This oversight maybe the reason a person who has been saved for 20 years still drinks spiritual milk while a new Christian is already on solid food.

I am not advocating for therapy, that’s a personal decision, but I am pointing to the need for introspection. We must take a step back, look at our lives and question why we think and act the way we do. This requires an openness to honestly view ourselves the way God sees us, through His lens without justifications or excuses. When you give your life to Christ, you are made whole and old things pass away. The issue with some of us is that we hang on to those old things without realizing. How will you know you need God’s help in certain areas of your life if you don’t analyze your thoughts and actions?broken 1

Change comes from a broken spirit, when we truly give up our lives for Christ. Living on the fence as a Christian, especially in this increasingly dark world, is not an option. We need to shatter the facade of being alright when we are not. We need to move from pride to humility. We need to understand our need for God everyday, every minute in everything we do. That requires brokenness. Often we ask God for help but behind the scenes we are working to solve our own problems.

David – the man after God’s own heart – understood his need for God. His words in Psalms show a man who knew his human limitations. However when he committed adultery and then murder, the Lord sent Nathan to show David who he had become. David did not even recognize himself in the story that Nathan told him. His internal decline had been a process that eventually manifested physically.

Therefore introspection is not to be done once but continually. We can never be too spiritual to accept that we are not perfect and as surely as sin entered this world, we will not attain perfection, only Jesus earns that distinction. On this side of eternity we have work to do. God is patient and merciful, He is waiting for your broken and contrite heart.

Psalm 51:17

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.

Written by Wadza Mhute for #Moving Forward With Yinka

 

 

 

Echoes of 2015: “Keep On Moving, Don’t Stop”

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 7 Comments

In one word, how would you describe your encounter with the year 2015?

Beyond any doubt, this is certainly my year of “Go, Get it done now”.  Even as am writing this, my head is thrown back in an exaggerated falling motion, hands and eye lashes flapping joyously with a deep amorous laughter (like an excited toddler) While at the back of my head, I envisioned my favorite Trinidadian musician (Mighty Sparrow) playing my favorite soca version of ‘Dancing Queen” as I grooved to the rhythm and yell out…Yes!!

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American Cancer Society – Making Strides Against Breast Cancer Walk  Team: Greater Than Cancer. OCTOBER 2015

Are you wondering “what planet is she on exactly, with all these gestures of excitement? Eh, common, ‘it’s not even close to what you’re thinking, honestly… (Lol) “so-get-your-crummy-mind-out-of-the refrigerator and listen to what I’ve got to say! (smiles).

Wow! My heart is completely paraded with these un-explainable kind of feeling you get when you just finished scooping up your last spoon of ice cream, its still melting on your tongue, but because you just don’t want to quickly loose that sugar rush sensation, you drag the dissolving process. You smile as you close your eyes, allowing the powerful luscious sensation to play hide and seek in your mouth. Hmmm.

You mutter to yourself, ‘Wholly Guacamole!! ‘This is s-w-e-e-t! You are licking the escaped creamy patch with your tongue and just hoping everyday would be an-ice-cream day, Yeah, it feels good right? Exactly! That’s the cloud I am on.

So, I bet everyone DID something spectacular and different this 2015? Something crazy but excitingly abstract? Something out of the norm, yet breathtakingly unique? Something unusual but rewarding? Believe me, every one of us DID something peculiar compared to 2014. Whether Commendable, Confusing or Complicated. Something did happened that has shifted our mindset! It’s called the Go, Get it done dictum!

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RCCG LSMC Total Woman Conference – April 2015

For me, I couldn’t have ended 2015 well without thanking God for all the beautiful spaces and platform of opportunities that were created for me! From the initiation and launching of the NGOs to the acceptance into doctoral school!

The powerful ministration at the Total Woman Conference, my wonderful superb sisters-united power team! The eye opener at the much awaited residency program in AZ! The long summer nights at the beach with family! The crab feast at the Inner harbor, the once in a lifetime impact and blessings received from Kenya during the QEG Summit!

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Queen Esther Generation Summit in Kenya. JUNE- JULY 2015

The joy of embracing new dreams and walking away from past distractions, standing tall to establish self in career! The “shut-the-front-door” kind of feelings you get when you decide to stand tall, no matter what! The mind-blowing and oh-so-humble experience of connecting with relevant links  in Nigeria, the magnitude of the support system.

OMG! My beautiful team members in Lagos still expanding, making headlines and treading on a just cause for humanity! PRICELESS.  Oh! What a night! @ Etim Inyang Crescent, V/Island with WAZOBIA Naija FM Spectacular midnight host of Love Clinic, Kbabalovedoctor. Awesome!

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WAZOBIA FM Lagos, Love Clinic Host, KBABALOVEDOCTOR. OCT 2015

 

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“My Life after Cancer” Interview with 60 Minutes TV, Lagos. Oct 2015.

Aha! The courageous families in whose

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Autism Awareness In Nigeria – Interview with TREK MAG. in Lagos. Sept 2015

presence, participation and position completed my GO GET IT DONE project in Nigeria. My first humanitarian award team, Thank you! For every support system unintentionally not mentioned. Thank you.Literally, this is for everyone who’s touched my heart in 2015, either paraded it, nursed it, comforted it, cared for it, scribbled on it or skipped it or even attempted to torture it! Thank you.

 

My Greater Than Cancer team in the US! Thank you for your support and your genuine love, for dragging yourselves out to walk with me that very cold Saturday morning in Oct! You guys rock and made a survivor feel so special to be alive. Love you all for real!

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Team: Greater Than Cancer, USA

I am grateful for new friendships defined, old ones restored and damaging ones put aside for remission. For all the projects left hanging but never forgotten, the best is yet to come.

Finally, let’s search our conscience in the remaining hours, ‘what walk awayhas 2015 done for you, lately? What is that beautiful memory you want to frame and adorn with praises? Or what’s that situation that looks like progress in the making but really behind closed doors, brings you to tears? What’s that addiction or craving you are still abhorring? What’s that one word you’ve been dreading to say? ‘Afraid of going into 2016? What’s that one brutal feeling of rejection, emptiness, hopelessness and depression you’d rather bury with 2015? Marital issues? Complicated relationships? Estranged Family members? Mr. Right still hiding? Health problems? Kids acting up? Conception not cooperating? Loved ones departure? ‘Got baggage? Got issues? ‘Got trust problem? ‘Got heart break? ‘Got love to give? Aha! ‘Got Christ? You do? ‘Then you already ‘Got this! 🙂

This is the best time to get up and get it done. Whatever it is that’s holding you back from your aspiration, ‘deal with it now. This is not even about making resolutions. This is more of a period of revelation.

I am hoping someone reading this will tap into that realm too. Set up inward realistic goals, and let your passion for success be your drive for the New Year. ‘Cos, that’s what am doing. Thank y’all for a rewarding 2015!  See you in a ‘Doing IT RIGHT 2016! by God’s grace.

Yours in HOPE as I share “Keep On Moving” by Soul II Soul.

Yinka.

Love songs in a fairy tale world. Do happy endings still exist?

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 9 Comments

I love a good story. I love love-songs that tell stories that are filled with drama, mystery, honesty, hope, grit, tension, release, passion, tenderness, love, restoration, and redemption.ft 1

My all-time favorite love songs/stories combine lots of these elements and finish with a happy-ending. My heart beats loudly for happy-endings and breaks without a sound when there’s an emotional turbulence. (Hmm, maybe that’s why I am still addicted to Indian movies).

I am usually edgy and fidgety at the beginning, a nervous wreck when feelings of passion and rage are about to be smashed by just mere words… ‘words that are so deep-seated, sentimentally erotic and nerve racking whimsical!ft 5

Aha! This is the part where I uncontrollably ball out in tears! The storyline gets to me, whether good or bad. I still get to wipe away a tear, sniffle through the self-acquired misery on behalf of my adopted cast. My enchanted moment!

Eventually, I bounce back to life wondering, Wow! Seriously? ‘Could this be real? ‘true love still exist? why does falling in love have to be so dramatic? ‘or expressing love have to be so painful? When we sing those leisurely played love songs, do we really mean it? I mean like…word for word? Unconditionally? Not like ‘you scratch my back, and I scratch yours too world”? Or are we just residing in a borrowed fairy tale world? Where our words do not align with our actions. ‘More like perfect strangers in a labyrinth drill? Emotion-free!

I remember when Disney’s Aladdin was released in 1992, my friends and I were totally amused by the theme song (A whole new world) and will mime to the lyrics courageously, like we knew exactly the power of love, ‘not that we had it dedicated to anyone special in particular, ‘it was just another karaoke event for us, but the lyrics were just so soothing and comfortable for anyone hoping to fall in love one day! ft 2

It was indeed splendid! I mean, ‘why wouldn’t a-young gal dream of flying on a magic carpet ride, seeing a whole new world with that special guy who can literally operate a magical carpet with his feelings! Remember folks! No mechanical experience needed here!! Fantasy or not. This is utopian! The real maudlin feeling that’s simply romantic! Ah! Tell me, ‘what else does a girl want? LOL!

So, there have been days in my life that have been heavy on the tension and light on the release of still believing in fairy tales. Moments when I’ve felt deep pain and longed for deep peace, hating those fairy tale stories. Weeks when hope evaded my heart because I had chosen to turn from God’s way and defiantly chose Yinka’s way (to live in a fairy tale world) Season’s when I felt like I had messed up so bad that a happy-ending for my life was simply impossible. I’d felt like one of the characters in the book I read and those deep romantic love songs.ft 4

Have you ever felt that way? Like there was a great chasm between your life and a happy-ending? Have you ever felt like you were in a situation, relationship or condition that was un-healable, un-helpable, and un-redeemable? I think we all have. If we are still honest with ourselves.

We all have that perfect love song hidden somewhere inside of us, never used our vocals to express it, but always nursing the lyrics, because they apply to us, it dictates exactly what we are going through and how we are feeling about someone or something.ft 3

One word: LOVE. Perfect, unconditional, doesn’t-matter-who-you-are-or-where-you’ve-been-or-what-you’ve-done love. God made a new and living way for our wounded hearts to be restored … so that everyone of us could experience deep peace, love, forgiveness, and hope.ft 6

What’s your happy-ending story? Still living in a fairy tale world? Hoping you will embrace true love in an authentic world as we begin to count down to the few days remaining in 2015. If you are reading this, remember I love you more and I sincerely mean it. Happy Holidays.

Yours in HOPE as I share my favorite love song/story as Aladdin takes Jasmine on a magical carpet ride. “A Whole New World” (musical recording by Regina Belle and Peabo Bryson).

Yinka

 

 

Comparison – by Kehinde Oguntunde

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 2 Comments

As I went about doing my kitchen chores, I couldn’t help listening to my children’s conversation.comp

“You do not color outside the line”, said the big sister to the little one.

“I know, but it’s my homework, not yours”, she responded.

“Mummy never likes it when we color outside the line, that’s why she likes my painting better”, big sister replied.

At that instant, I knew I had to interrupt their conversation before it escalated into something else. Truth be told, I have always loved neat and beautiful paintings (I was an excellent art student back in high school) and I (unconsciously/consciously) made my older daughter tow my footsteps.

The younger sister on the other hand, detests anything that deals with coloring. In a nutshell, I find myself comparing my kids with each other or perhaps comparing them with me. I’m sure most of us can relate to this.

But the truth is: COMPARISONS ARE DETESTABLE.

If you want to be a miserable mortal, then compare. You compare when you place someone beside someone else for the purpose of emphasizing the differences or showing the likenesses. This applies to places and things as well as people.comp 4

We can become so proficient at this activity that we sustain our addiction through an unconscious force of habit. Inadvertently, the wheels of our thinking slide over into the ruts of this detestable mindset. Comparison appears in at least two forms.

First: We compare ourselves with others. You can imagine the results already. It is either you are prompted to feel smug and proud because your strengths outweigh others weaknesses . . . or, more often, you begin to feel threatened, and inferior because you fail to measure up. Striving to emulate a self-imposed standard, you begin to slide from the pleasant level of achievement of the real you to the sinking sands of I don’t know who. This sometimes leads to extreme role-playing where you try every way to adapt and alter your portrait to fit into someone else’s frame.

In simpler terms, you’ve given away your real personality for a phony disguise. That’s detestable! Paul wrote about similar sentiments to a church that had become known for its comparison cliques:

“We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise”. (2 Cor. 10:12 NIV). The very next verse tells us, “Our goal is to measure up to God’s plan for us”. Not for someone else, but for you, personally. God’s great desire for us is that we fulfill His plan for us in our own lives. In His way—His timing.comp 3

Second: We compare others with others. This is worse than unfair; it’s senseless and often, cruel. Children suffer most from well-meaning adults who show off one child’s talents in front of another child in some misbegotten effort at motivation. This relates to the illustration above with my kids. That sort of comparison is toxic. It poisons a child’s self-image and smothers the very motivation the parent was seeking to arouse.

But children aren’t the only victims. We find ourselves comparing preachers and teachers; church philosophies and orders of service; soloists and song leaders; personalities and prayers; wives and mothers; families and friends; homes and cars; salaries and jobs; husbands and fathers; luxuries and limitations; pain and pleasure.

That’s detestable! Why not accept people and places and things exactly as they are? Isn’t that true maturity? Why not accept and adjust to differences as quickly and enthusiastically as God forgives our wrongs and stands behind our efforts to try, and try again? When love flows, acceptance grows.

Written by: Kehinde Oguntunde for #Moving Forward With Yinka

**About the writer**

Kehinde works as a Data Integrity Specialist. She is happily married to Sola. They both reside in Philadelphia and are blessed with 2 beautiful girls and an adorable boy! She enjoys working with children, reading, writing and of course singing with her husband.