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A Shift in Perspective for 2020!

A Shift in Perspective for 2020!

Let me start by sincerely asking… ‘How are you doing? Are You Okay?

For many people, 2020 has proved a challenging and tedious year. If 2020 taught us anything, it’s that resiliency always wins! For some, storms of illness, financial difficulty, social unrest and depression have overwhelmingly swept upon once-peaceful lives.

Quarantines and social distancing have prohibited many from joining with family and close friends for nearly a year, and as Year 2021 approaches that will likely still remain the case for many.

More than ever all the small things have become bigger.

We’ve gone to bed puzzled and perplexed at night, woken up with uncertainties of what could be… not knowing what the next day, week or month would bring.

From eating in a restaurant to seeing a movie, to physically being able to hug a friend, or embracing outrageous political differences with little space to vent, to just listening to each other’s heartbeat when anxiety sets in, unveiling heartaches when headlines deliver sour news, or proclaim happy-thoughts when sudden glimpse of hope comes with the morning dew! we no longer discount the small aspects of life that were once so accessible.

2020 has shifted us to recognize those small things, and the large impact they have: More time alone with our conscience!

What has more time spent alone taught you?

Are we still holding back on circumstantial boundaries? Do we see only difficulty in every trial we’ve encountered this year? or forge ahead like an optimist, see the opportunity in every difficulty?

How can we evaluate these things and come back to God with a grateful heart for such revelations or new ideas?

Hmmm… ‘This year has brought so many of us to our breaking and emerging points. Family bonds once trusted are now tested, trashed or tremendously treasured! friendship values once secured are re-evaluated for sincerity or lack of depth to fill the void and empitness we now face. Loss and pain have plagued every one of us in 2020, in moments both fraught and debilitating.

From sympathizing with friends, families and clients who’ve lost loved ones to giving mental health support and encouragement about the after effects and lifelong scars of losing a baby, a mother, a father, a brother, a sister, grandparents, all alone… in a-cold isolated pandemic period.. that literally steals the comfort of a warm embrace… ‘an unbearable grief, experienced by many but talked about by few but riddled with (unwarranted) shame, and perpetuating a cycle of solitary mourning.

We have comforted each other over virtual platforms as though we were there in person! burial rites are performed in a swift due to gathering restrictions, saving the tears to swell up behind face marks or allowing some to run freely on our screens, behind the walls of isolation.

Some of us were bold enough to celebrate milestones, weddings, birthdays or graduations in very restrictive gathering! Some, grateful for an opportunity to start afresh, rebuild broken relationships or mingle again without knowing it would probably be their last in October… #RIPMrsPatriciaEwetuya-Daramola.

A shift in perspective can take us from complacency to content.

Uncertainty can be powerfully intimidating, yet we must make decisions.

Perspective is key in finding joy despite the circumstances this season.

So, like my 9-year-old daughter would explain after going through her scheduled social stories without wearing her prescription glasses, “My perspective on events is much like wearing a pair of glasses. Certain lens will help me see the blur of fear, unknown things approaching or confusion, where another lens can provide me with much needed clarity”

More quality time spent with my 3 kids and Husband of 23-years in 2020 has taught us all Calmness & Clarity.

The perspective that some of the difficulties we face now perhaps are growing us in new and exciting ways. As scary as they look now, we have no idea what kind of good God is spinning out of it.

So, as we approach Year 2021, ditching all the uproar of 2020 behind, it can be easy to feel hopeless, anxious, or even bitter, however we can choose to not fall prey to these feelings.

We can partner with God to give thanks, despite the circumstances… and continue to look up to Him!

This past holiday probably looked different around the dining room table, but connection can still occur. Video chats and phone calls will be a resource to utilize well, but real connection can still occur from such unlikely platforms.

Perhaps gratitude can be found in using these options, and we can have authentic communications of where we all are in heart and mind. This is something to be thankful for, to have exchanges beyond the weather or superficialities, but to dive deeper into outlooks, our state of mental health!

We are all struggling, but we are not struggling alone. Because there is Hope.

Again, whether you find yourself celebrating or grieving these days, feeling hopeful or hopeless, actively choose to trust God to set you free of past battles. For His ways will surely prevail in the end.

We should not discount the faith He is building in us during this time either, for through these hard times He is revealing more of the character being born in us. Birth is painful, but it results in new life.

Perhaps these hardships are birthing a new vibrancy of life for us as we approach 2021.

Happy New Year, Stay Safe as we move forward into 2021.

Yours in HOPE as I share Whitney Houston’s ‘I LOOK TO YOU’

OlaYinka

 

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Sending off 2014 (the favorable, the awful and the mishap) and how I discovered my own strength!

year agoHave you ever been in a position where you feel like…Yes… ‘You finally got something done! All the goals you’d created at the end of 2013 have matured and still yielding fruits…nice!

Or are you at a crossroad of a certain goal you created around this time last year that is yet to show case itself?  You know you started 2014 determined and expectant, but along the way something un-expected happened and you get side-tracked or distracted. You’ve practically dragged yourself through the days, the weeks and the months hoping and still expectant. You are not alone! 40% of goal writers are also in this dilemma, but because we are still alive today – ‘there is still time to catch up!

If you are reading this…you are definitely a part of the reason why I am still keeping the faith and encouraged to keep writing and sharing real life’s event through everyday-people’s views, challenges, joy, concerns and testimonies.

Eventually, I’ve learnt that there is a purpose for everyone we meet. Some will test us, some will use us, and some will teach us. But most importantly… some will bring out the best in us. And trust me, it has been all of that for me looking back… but I am buoyantly taking the lessons learnt from it and striding into 2015 with a cheerful mindset, like…Ok! I discovered me!

So, this is a special salutation to all my readers:

“When I thought hope was what you could buy with self-pity, when all I could think of was creating an outlet for passionate expression, even when life’s issues frustrates and dictates above the edge, I found my strength in you, I discovered what lights up my fire and you helped me chase after the match. Little did I know that the same passion was also helping in building me up. Little did I know that our hearts of human tenderness often begins to beat only when we allow and discover a particular pursuit that absorbs us, frees us, challenges us or gives us a sense of meaning, joy or passion. Ah!  I am most grateful and say a big heartfelt Thank you!

For encouraging me by building this blog and also believing in me that there’s more and what’s next? and sincerely always pushing me to just keep writing even when I tell myself I’m done and tired. For constantly tolerating my ‘craze-now/cool-later attitude’ Thank you! (even though I seldom say it) I am grateful and I acknowledge your gifting! smiles… (You know who you are!) God bless!

For everyone who’d find another “New Post from Moving Forward with Yinka” in their mailbox, or a certain commercial-like name (anthonialawrence.com) and would re-consider opening it to read – I say Thank you (I know, sometimes it can be annoying right?) For everyone who’s approached or applauded me with “Hey, that was a beautiful article you posted! “I am inspired” or “You touched me” or “Thanks, that message was for me” “Good one, Yinka” “I love your blog” – I say thank you! (I am more inspired when I know my message is digested).

For my support group at Therapy Sol and Shelter who always welcomed me into their community whenever I needed to spend time with them – a big thank you! For all the readers who were courageous enough to send in their comments or posts or articles – I say thank you (you made me shine more with your bravery!) For all the people I wrote about (living or dead) – thanks for giving me a story to relate to!

For the grace and wisdom to answer some challenging comments, I say thank you for bringing it on! For reconnecting with my college alumni group AIESEC after 20 years and living-forward with them, thanks guys – you still rock!

For the love of poetry/dancing and dragging my family to watch Shakespeare in the park with me in New York City! or for Zumba class… ‘Priceless memories – I say thank you! ‘love you all for life!

For my Greater than Cancer team & My Day out with the Ladies group – You are the best and un-forgettable!’ love you all for real!

For having the courage to discuss the issues of Sexuality, Love, Abuse, Survivorship, Pain and Relationship! I am most grateful to all my guest writers for sharing their platform of awareness and hope. Believe me, you’ve made a difference in someone’s life!

For all those we lost in 2014 – I pray perpetual rest be granted unto them. For new lives and new birth, I pray God’s guidance and protection.

It’s been a beautiful and rewarding 2014. I have gained very useful knowledge. I have been comforted with sincerity. I have rekindled the true meaning of friendship. I have learnt to embrace fondness without breaking a heart. I have learnt to pick my battles. I have also laid down the burdens of aged and disruptive relationship. I have opened my doors and welcomed new tenderness in other people’s shortcoming. I have inquired from God and have learnt to appreciate beauty through the little things I’d been taking for granted. I am a whole year wiser and drunk with life’s passion to succeed, and ready for greater things to come. I hope you’ve all been able to discover some “new strengths’ in 2014.

Thank you everyone…’because you believe in me and made it happen in 2014! ‘See you in 2015 with more of me!

Yours in hope as I share one of my favorite Whitney Houston’s song below.

Yinka.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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