moving forward

Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow…

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 9 Comments

love 2m

Here we go again! It’s another Valentine’s Day – FEB 14th.

I guess it’s another day for everyone who claims or pretends to be in love, falling in love, crazy about someone, or just a routine gesture of forced emotions to declare their un-solicited affection. It is indeed another season to pretentiously or sincerely spend money on un-wanted flowers (that eventually will wither and decay in the trash can), another reason to spend a little more on chocolates, expensive dinner and some humungous teddy bear that eventually becomes a hoarder’s delight.

Hmmm, don’t get me wrong! Am not against celebrating this much-ado-about everything event called Valentine’s Day! I think over the years I have gotten a fair share of my own fantasy and now so used to simply not waiting till Feb 14th to tell or show those around me how much I really do care about them!

Gone are the days when my girlfriends and I would just marvel in excitement and laugh out loud or calculate the cost of the goodies or the sizes of those spooky looking love-deprived teddy bears we used to receive then in our single-girl season…it’s so funny how naïve and ridiculous we were then (lol).love 3m

I mean like, ‘Oh, cos he gave me a huge teddy bear and boxes of assorted Cadbury chocolates….’Aha, he’s the perfect guy! Or “Oh no, He made me a custom-made gigantic valentine card (oh yes, that was the in-thing then, lol) – and the best part of it all was the drama behind the presentation of the card/teddy bear and chocolates! It’s like a young guy going to face a panel of decision makers regarding his future love life. (Lol). “Eh, please kindly accept this as a token of my love” the lover boy would say as beads of sweat gather on his now creased forehead, hair nicely combed back, shoe well-polished and shinning you could still smell the fresh shoe polish, hands trembling as his newly acquired packet shirt is all buttoned up and seems to be choking his neck” His Blue jeans perfume carrying on even after his disappearance. (Lol). Boy oh boy! Phew!

But today in history, where has all the luxury and comfort of romances gone to? Do people still even make those custom made cards, carved out with the letters of the recipient’s name or heart shape? With those long captivating poems that mesmerize and keep your heart dazzled in the awesomeness of fondness? Those things usually come delivered even days before Feb 14th, so by the time its Feb 14th, you are either in love with the sender, thinking about the sender or you are approaching a different route in discovering love elsewhere. Awww, good old memories.

Falling in love was made to be simple, direct and un-complicated.love 1m

Now it’s been replaced with non-tangible things, irrelevant platforms and advanced technology that causes friction and disability in true expression. Where has showing love gone to? Is this display of yearly affection guaranteed? What happens next valentine season? Will this love still be evident?

I will be moving past those memories, but lovingly taking every bit of lesson learned from them. Loving those I choose to love does not limit me to Feb 14th.  Showing my affection sincerely is a 365day- thing for me. Or even better, some days when I just feel compelled, connected and in tune with what deep affection has to offer me…

Hopefully, we all can genuinely celebrate today and tomorrow and the day after like we STILL are in the valentine-state-of-mind. That really, it’s not only about lovers and couples, but sincerely for everyone or anyone who’s made an impact in our lives, someone who’s touched us so deep inside that their marks leave good memories to cherish… for that someone who out of all the thousands you’ve ever loved, just stands out and truly understands you, for that friend who’s not even thinking of celebrating today because they don’t have a reason to, for that person you know grieving the loss of a dead loved one, for that single who’s wallowed with condemnation and rejection, for that heartbroken-used-to-be-in-love pal who’s given up on love. This is the moment, the time to reach out and hold their hands…or give them your audience.love 2m2

Hopefully, by the end of today, we can boldly say, ‘Hey! I will still love (be there for you) tomorrow and always. But, as for me, I will love you even better than today, if tomorrow comes. It’s a promise.

Yours in HOPE as I share James Durbin “Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow” (one of my favorite rendition).

Yinka.

 

 

 

God of Broken Things by Wadza Mhute.

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / Leave a comment

I was having a discussion with my friend about therapy for Christians. My friend is seeing a therapist for work-related trauma but she had doubts about the process because she is a Christian. She moved passed initial misgivings once she started seeing a therapist and realized the need to speak to someone about her issues. Then a day later another Christian friend casually mentioned advice her therapist gave.broken 2

The message I was receiving from these seemingly random discussions was the need for me to look inward. It seems, at least to me, that once one receives Christ then the need for personal reflection takes a back seat and we are sometimes mired in religiosity and fail to understand ourselves. As Christians we speak to God through prayer and He speaks to us in many ways including through His word. In our prayer time, however, do we ask God to show us ourselves? This oversight maybe the reason a person who has been saved for 20 years still drinks spiritual milk while a new Christian is already on solid food.

I am not advocating for therapy, that’s a personal decision, but I am pointing to the need for introspection. We must take a step back, look at our lives and question why we think and act the way we do. This requires an openness to honestly view ourselves the way God sees us, through His lens without justifications or excuses. When you give your life to Christ, you are made whole and old things pass away. The issue with some of us is that we hang on to those old things without realizing. How will you know you need God’s help in certain areas of your life if you don’t analyze your thoughts and actions?broken 1

Change comes from a broken spirit, when we truly give up our lives for Christ. Living on the fence as a Christian, especially in this increasingly dark world, is not an option. We need to shatter the facade of being alright when we are not. We need to move from pride to humility. We need to understand our need for God everyday, every minute in everything we do. That requires brokenness. Often we ask God for help but behind the scenes we are working to solve our own problems.

David – the man after God’s own heart – understood his need for God. His words in Psalms show a man who knew his human limitations. However when he committed adultery and then murder, the Lord sent Nathan to show David who he had become. David did not even recognize himself in the story that Nathan told him. His internal decline had been a process that eventually manifested physically.

Therefore introspection is not to be done once but continually. We can never be too spiritual to accept that we are not perfect and as surely as sin entered this world, we will not attain perfection, only Jesus earns that distinction. On this side of eternity we have work to do. God is patient and merciful, He is waiting for your broken and contrite heart.

Psalm 51:17

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.

Written by Wadza Mhute for #Moving Forward With Yinka

 

 

 

Dangerously living in a fool’s paradise.

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 10 Comments

coolio 1

It’s a beautiful, sunny day and you are going outside to take a walk and enjoy the brush of the heat on your skin. You change your mind, head back inside. Suddenly, you remember that you forgot to take your cell phone with you. But, you want to spend quality time with yourself un-interrupted, like meditate as you stroll around the neighborhood. You don’t want to be reminded of that heart ache you’ve been trying to bury, or that disturbing message you’d received that got you twisted and confused.  The back lash from the grapevine!

Instead, you go back inside, grab a bottle of water and sacrificially bury your cell phone inside the kitchen closet and walk out of the door; chin up, chest out, feeling proud of your little courage. You are certainly on a roll! Phew!

Wait-a-minute! ’Congratulations! Awesome bravery…but, for how long?

I remember in 1995 when the song “Gangsta Paradise by Coolio was just coolio 3released. Every house party in Port Harcourt then played it like they dined and wined with Coolio himself! I didn’t understand the content of the lyrics much, but we all just hummed to the chorus and showed off our hot steps.

Apparently, until much later when I sat down to watch the movie it featured in: “Dangerous Minds” Starring Michelle Pfeiffer as retired U.S. Marine Lou Anne Johnson, who took up a teaching position at Carlmont High School in Belmont, California, in 1989, where most of her students were African-American and Latino teenagers from East Palo Alto, a poverty-stricken, racially segregated, economically deprived city at the opposite end of the school district., the film was released to a mixture of mostly negative critical reception, but became a surprise box office success in the summer of 1995, leading to the creation of a short-lived television series.

At the end of the year, the teacher announces to the class that she will not continue teaching at the school, which prompts an unbridled display of emotion from the students who refuse to let her leave. Overwhelmed, she decides to stay. Hmm!  Yeah…’stay back with the same students who had wickedly crawled up her skin into misery! Who does that?

So, our life is filled with twisters – indecisions, contemplating over lifelong struggles, overcrowded schedules, impossiblecoolio 2 demands from friends and families, unrealistic expectations, emotional bankruptcy, and physical exhaustion. During those turbulent times, how did you handle it?

Growing up, I would run and hide under my blanket or just bury myself in a good book and block the world out until the storm passes over! But now, my blanket is consciously pulled off by my 3 wonderful children reminding me that  (1) Homework needs to be reviewed (2) Dinner needs to be served! (3) Mom! life goes on! just step out of that blanket and get-it-together!

So, I have come to two realizations; first, there will always be another storm and second, what I must do is learn how to prepare for storms before they hit or deal with the storm and move forward!

As we approach the end of the year, let’s think back to the past months and review the reasons why we have been stagnant, stuck or suppressed? any reasons why we just need to bury some hatchets and start afresh?  Have we embraced solitude after a storm?

‘Are we sincerely seeking God’s face for direction? how about how brave Michelle Pfeiffer was in the movie as she dealt with challenges that made her stronger and daring even at the face of death? Or Coolio’s heart rendering concerns on how we live our lives in false declaration?  ‘are we still in tune with personal goals to do better? Are we addicted to social praise? Craving for recognition or acceptance by a confused world itself?

Why do we still always end up hurting each other, with our bashful words and resentful attitude? Even as we portray such magnitude of holiness, while our personal mirror sees us as Pharisees? ‘Aren’t we still living in that hooded paradise? Hopefully, by the time we begin the countdown, our hearts will take us to places our emotions dare to thread; so that our mind, body and soul will be renewed for 2016.

Yours in HOPE as I share one of my favorite Coolio’s music/Dangerous Minds soundtrack: “Gangsta Paradise”

Yinka.

https://youtu.be/6sL6WrWHkhw

“I know what you did in the past” – ‘SO WHAT!!!

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 8 Comments

Moving ahead of  “I know what you did in the past” entitlement attitude. Time to shout back, “So What!”

It is another Friday evening with my “gang” (as I fondly call my once-a month-girls-hang-out colleagues). We are sitted at our favorite spot inside Ms. Tootsie on South Street; waiting patiently for the Chef’s special to be served. For a change, I ignored my obsession for their collard green; (always slowly cooked and delicately garnished with smoked turkey chops). Staring at us, our abandoned funky glasses that looks like an inverted pyramid, begging to be touched; un-finished virgin Piña Colada, Lemon Drop Martini and Long Island Iced Tea. Tonight, it’s my turn to pick a topic of discussion for all to debate on before we hit the karaoke room to display our happy kidsawkward singing sensation.

Not today! (arrgh!) My mind is just so crowded. Could it be am under stress from prepping for the Autism talk coming up soon? Or could it be tension from my current Law & Ethic class with my very critical professor giving me a tough time that’s bringing up this scholarly headache, probably from reading about all those outrageous legislative amendments! Where do I begin? No matter what, I must produce a topic for my girls-night-out! Phew!

And then the light bulb flickered on inside my head! The tabloid had it.

BLINK! My eyelashes flickered in excitement!

With sudden exaggerated confidence, I cleared my throat and asked: How do you defend or confront your past stories? Why should you try to defend an old error you made in the time of unknown? Should you fight to prove a point? Or just let it be? After all, it was in the past?

I settled back in the lumpy cabin chair, grabbed my drink, picked out the drained cherry and gulped it down with a sigh! An obvious smirk on my face as I watched the reaction on the faces of my dear friends: The fashion conscious Oriental accounting guru, who can give a lecture on the importance of bikini wax! The chocolate-skin Jamaican groover with killer dance steps and large heart, who still dreams of approaching Usher for stealing her dance moves, hmm! The soft-spoken, emotional and always in-love Caucasian, ah! Don’t mention cupid near her! And the very outspoken full mouthed, full-bodied and very affectionate African-American, whose southern accent flows freely when she’s excited!

Tell me ladies, how do you fight back?

Our entitlement attitude defines how we react and respond to what we know or hear about other people. It is like an ownership title or power we have over someone or something revealed to us in confidence, trust or at a time of vulnerability. It can be our boastful privilege of the known amongst the unknown, Our rights to the exposed and broken in spirits, it is the burden of the weight of another person’s secret and how we secure it within the depth of our hearts or how we tend to view them, even after the vow for secrecy or confidentiality has been made. For a moment, we could be judgmental or biased without even knowing it, which is okay; just for that moment, but not for long. It is not our path, not our business or our story!

So, recently there’s been shocking photos of the British royal family giving a Nazi salute in 1933 on the grounds of Balmoral, their castle in the Scottish Highlands. It was taken from a recently unearthed family film, and has sparked a controversy in Britain; the ancient footage of the queen being coached into a Nazi salute by her uncle Edward was taken at a time when she could not possibly have understood the gesture’s significance. Film shot eight decades ago and apparently from Her Majesty’s personal family archive has been obtained and exploited in this manner. The very words: “Queen filmed doing Hitler salute” are, however, so innocently delicious that no tabloid could fail to run this antique trifle.

And her reply to the tabloid? “So What! “It is my past” “Not yours! Deal with it!

Wow! That was a very good one. Wouldn’t life be so much easy-going if we all can boldly lash back by saying ‘So What? “What you going to do about it? “It’s my story and my property” “What gives you ownership or entitlement over my past?” What makes you think you can pull me down because you know something juicy about my past? “That was then, and it was all a plot you never got a part in then” So “beat it! (Lol) Of course, it’s meaningless. Of course, it’s a wonderful scoop. We reserve our right to feign outrage.

Ask yourself today, how have I handled my entitlement attitude? Do I puff my chest out and claim ownership over the story-teller? Do I dominate their weakness because I know the button to push to ridicule the storyteller? Have I been compassionate enough to feel the pain or burden of the storyteller? Have I used it negatively for my own selfishness? Have I uplifted or inspired the story-teller?

No matter how we see it, it is still their Story, Their Past, Their Blunder, Their Pain and Their Lapse. Sometimes that place they don’t even want to remember or re-visit ever again. When we are told a secret or when we are confided in, we are more or less the preferred audience at that time, maybe a very special one. Because it usually takes a lot for someone in pain to open up about a worrisome past. That does not make us a tell-tale superhero or a local broadcaster. The only part we play is either to encourage or inspire. It is not our story to judge or juggle with. It is a silent call for help, one clothed with regrets or sad memories. Let’s get rid of the anchorman mentality!

Here is a quick fix for someone reading this; when approached or ridiculed for a story from your past, develop the courage to smile as you say “SO WHAT” and mean it like you don’t really need a reply either. Yeah, it is a Rhetorical question! What gives us that sense of entitlement anyway? Part of it is found in the middle of the word entitlement itself: “title.” We think people “owe us” because of the title we hold in their lives: Oh please! Time has changed, people are moving forward with new beginnings and new mindset. I am like those boys in the picture above! The change in time doesn’t have to bother us! I also had stains from life’s tragedy, still living and am still howling ‘So what! – ‘like we all don’t have a sweet and sour past? I do, and so does everyone reading this too, but thank God for his mercy! He made all things new! We are all in a better place today as we move forward in life!

Yours in HOPE as I share “Moving Forward” Victory World Music feat. Montell Jordan, Ricardo Sanchez & Israel Houghton.

Yinka.

Sending off 2014 (the favorable, the awful and the mishap) and how I discovered my own strength!

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 8 Comments

year agoHave you ever been in a position where you feel like…Yes… ‘You finally got something done! All the goals you’d created at the end of 2013 have matured and still yielding fruits…nice!

Or are you at a crossroad of a certain goal you created around this time last year that is yet to show case itself?  You know you started 2014 determined and expectant, but along the way something un-expected happened and you get side-tracked or distracted. You’ve practically dragged yourself through the days, the weeks and the months hoping and still expectant. You are not alone! 40% of goal writers are also in this dilemma, but because we are still alive today – ‘there is still time to catch up!

If you are reading this…you are definitely a part of the reason why I am still keeping the faith and encouraged to keep writing and sharing real life’s event through everyday-people’s views, challenges, joy, concerns and testimonies.

Eventually, I’ve learnt that there is a purpose for everyone we meet. Some will test us, some will use us, and some will teach us. But most importantly… some will bring out the best in us. And trust me, it has been all of that for me looking back… but I am buoyantly taking the lessons learnt from it and striding into 2015 with a cheerful mindset, like…Ok! I discovered me!

So, this is a special salutation to all my readers:

“When I thought hope was what you could buy with self-pity, when all I could think of was creating an outlet for passionate expression, even when life’s issues frustrates and dictates above the edge, I found my strength in you, I discovered what lights up my fire and you helped me chase after the match. Little did I know that the same passion was also helping in building me up. Little did I know that our hearts of human tenderness often begins to beat only when we allow and discover a particular pursuit that absorbs us, frees us, challenges us or gives us a sense of meaning, joy or passion. Ah!  I am most grateful and say a big heartfelt Thank you!

For encouraging me by building this blog and also believing in me that there’s more and what’s next? and sincerely always pushing me to just keep writing even when I tell myself I’m done and tired. For constantly tolerating my ‘craze-now/cool-later attitude’ Thank you! (even though I seldom say it) I am grateful and I acknowledge your gifting! smiles… (You know who you are!) God bless!

For everyone who’d find another “New Post from Moving Forward with Yinka” in their mailbox, or a certain commercial-like name (anthonialawrence.com) and would re-consider opening it to read – I say Thank you (I know, sometimes it can be annoying right?) For everyone who’s approached or applauded me with “Hey, that was a beautiful article you posted! “I am inspired” or “You touched me” or “Thanks, that message was for me” “Good one, Yinka” “I love your blog” – I say thank you! (I am more inspired when I know my message is digested).

For my support group at Therapy Sol and Shelter who always welcomed me into their community whenever I needed to spend time with them – a big thank you! For all the readers who were courageous enough to send in their comments or posts or articles – I say thank you (you made me shine more with your bravery!) For all the people I wrote about (living or dead) – thanks for giving me a story to relate to!

For the grace and wisdom to answer some challenging comments, I say thank you for bringing it on! For reconnecting with my college alumni group AIESEC after 20 years and living-forward with them, thanks guys – you still rock!

For the love of poetry/dancing and dragging my family to watch Shakespeare in the park with me in New York City! or for Zumba class… ‘Priceless memories – I say thank you! ‘love you all for life!

For my Greater than Cancer team & My Day out with the Ladies group – You are the best and un-forgettable!’ love you all for real!

For having the courage to discuss the issues of Sexuality, Love, Abuse, Survivorship, Pain and Relationship! I am most grateful to all my guest writers for sharing their platform of awareness and hope. Believe me, you’ve made a difference in someone’s life!

For all those we lost in 2014 – I pray perpetual rest be granted unto them. For new lives and new birth, I pray God’s guidance and protection.

It’s been a beautiful and rewarding 2014. I have gained very useful knowledge. I have been comforted with sincerity. I have rekindled the true meaning of friendship. I have learnt to embrace fondness without breaking a heart. I have learnt to pick my battles. I have also laid down the burdens of aged and disruptive relationship. I have opened my doors and welcomed new tenderness in other people’s shortcoming. I have inquired from God and have learnt to appreciate beauty through the little things I’d been taking for granted. I am a whole year wiser and drunk with life’s passion to succeed, and ready for greater things to come. I hope you’ve all been able to discover some “new strengths’ in 2014.

Thank you everyone…’because you believe in me and made it happen in 2014! ‘See you in 2015 with more of me!

Yours in hope as I share one of my favorite Whitney Houston’s song below.

Yinka.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our biases in ASSUMPTION and ACCEPTANCE of other people!

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 15 Comments

 

ste picJust one look. A glimpse. A glance. A peek. And our imagination starts running wild. If possible, our   interpretation and perception of what is placed on our laps is now portrayed as a footstool for appraisal. For every one of us, at least there’s been a moment or two of intolerant and superficial judging. And within another degree, it is transformed into a battlefield of suspicion or dislike.

Imagine THIS: It is Monday morning, you are at the gas station, minding your own business and a certain hype outrageously-clothed lady walks up to you, all the essence of her womanhood displayed in parade soliciting. She looked you over and smiled over her loud popping bubble gum now stained with her red lipstick and asked for directions! What comes to your mind immediately? Did you quickly tighten the hold on your wallet or just quickly labeled her?

Imagine THAT: On a Friday evening, by the entrance of a coffee shop is a young man in dirty tattered over-size jeans, his grey shirt, dirty with missing buttons, probably due to an organized gang-fight or survival on the street, his exposed chest crowded and begging for a visit to any available hygiene-clinic, there’s a strong rancid odor around him, he’s probably a homeless retard on drugs or struggling to get off it. He approaches you with his arms spread out, toothless smile and looking lost! Money? Food? Or a friendly hug? He’s looking at you questioningly…What Do You Do?

We have all been there. Our devoted posture of Immaculacy, Pureness and Self-righteousness. We give a first look at someone we assume to be not of the benchmark and immediately we set a guard around ourselves and step up with a higher approach of self dis-favor.

Sometimes, even so spiritual as thanking God for not being in that person’s shoes. But really… if anything and we are sincere with ourselves, we are truly the ones with the issue of intolerance, prejudice and unfairness. Not the other party. Why? ‘Like they know any better? That’s why they are more approachable, even during their storm!

Stereotyping leads to racial prejudice when people emotionally react to the name of a group, ascribe characteristics to members of that group, and then evaluate those characteristics. It reflects expectations and beliefs about the characteristics of members of groups perceived as different from one’s own, prejudice represents the emotional response, and discrimination refers to actions.

So, there’s a proverb about judging people I grew up with, from my Mother’s hometown of Delta State – (in her Ebu language): “We are ever aware and mindful of people we think we know and love, but we can never be sure of other people or a stranger’s love or feelings for us” – and till now, She will reminiscence and still talk about the importance of accepting and loving a stranger in distress – because you can never tell their story, until you are told.

But because my first visit to the shelter required me reading books and watching documentary on teenagers with stories of life on the streets, sex addiction, graffiti etc. That prepared me and took away all that was supposed to send me running back to my car or to a pity party zone. What’s inside the minds of the people we ‘hang and dismiss” is deeper and commanding than we can ever imagine. Their stories changes with a look at their heart.

Their acceptance to recovery and salvation is far genuine compared to an everyday God fearing believer. Because they have wounds that are already open for all to see. What else is there to hide? Just a word of assurance, a term that defines their past, a hug that could be cold outwardly, yet comforting inside, a bible verse that could pretentiously be ignored while you’re there, but a remedy at night when crisis begins. A firm hand shake rather than a scrutinizing look of disgust, repulsion and antipathy. Stereotype keeps people from processing new or unexpected information about each individual, thus biasing the impression formation process.

Today, I am encouraging someone to reach out of their standard! to approach and love a stranger without boundary! Instead of loving the person and hating the sin, we treat people out of our norm as not worthy of our love or God’s love. We apply our morals to their lives and fight against their freedoms because of our beliefs. How else will they know our God? If not through our works!

May God help us all!

Yinka

“Who say, “Keep to yourself, do not come near me, for I am too holy for you.” These are a smoke in my nostrils, a fire that burns all the day.

Isaiah 65:5

 

 

Friday Night Conversation with ‘Yinka! – Collection of Short Stories (Terms of Endearment – Part One)

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence / 10 Comments

 It is another FRIDAY night, Yippee! ‘Do I hear jubilation bells? I am done dancing off-tune to Pharrell’s “HAPPY” at Zumba class tonight and preparing to hang out with the kids, while a-toddler I know with a distinctive contagious laughter, will exercise her cuteness-power and bully us all into watching “Frozen” again for the 37th time in history!

Anyway, If you are reading this, you’re probably spending your Friday night indoor or on your way out! But definitely not captured and forced to watch Frozen with a bunch of excited kids matching up with the movie word-for-word. But! Alas, Friday night conversation continues with my short story on the power of attachment. Enjoy!

Terms of Endearment – Part One.

Omolara! Omolara! ‘Are you listening to me? What’s wrong with you?

Omolara is not even aware of her mother speaking to her. She is still excited and day dreaming. The news about her admission into a University couldn’t have come at a better time in her life. She’d just discovered some strange things about her step sister Yanju, frightened and confused because she was afraid she was getting too close to her Father’s personal assistant and needed to be far away from everyone. What made it even more joyous was the fact that she will be going out of Lagos to school, no one had to know that she’d secretly paid her father’s driver, Baba Sanni to help process and re-direct her admission from University of Lagos to Port Harcourt. From stories of bewilderment she’s heard from her cousins, she knew Port Harcourt was just the place for her! She just couldn’t wait to hit the Garden City!

She grew up within the four corners of the affluence of Ikoyi’s Glover road and Alexandra Avenue, then travelled further down across the bridge to AIS for High school. Her life has always been surrounded by all the beautiful things only good money could buy. It is always within the same crowd of people who goes to the same school, same church, same club house and the same social event and discuss the same thing! boastful talk on power, celebrity gossips on who’s who, who’s wearing the latest from Tiffany’s, Family houses in UK, Father’s Swiss account and Mother’s trip to a newly acquired company in Switzerland. All always stuck up, snobbish and arrogant.

Hanging around them is always a foreign lady as their maid, sometimes addressed as “Ms. Pino or Ms. Dino” either carrying their leisure 100% genuine leather Prada or Gucci bag or rushing to the bar to get them a refill of another chilled Chapman. Omolara never enjoyed any of this. No privacy! Well, except when she’s whisked away for summer vacation via first class on British Caledonian airline where she’s allowed to mix with her schoolmates on board. All chatting away noisily in that “spoilt rich kid” attitude. Pulling in all the “r” and ‘o” in their conversation, automatically changing their accents while their phonemes is replaced by a defect in their sinus, rolling their eye and faking exaggeration of awareness, even though their plane still hasn’t taken off the soil of their mother tongue. Hmm!

So, it is all the way to Port Harcourt to live with her 3 cousins (from her mother’s side of the family) who were already in the College of Technology and School of Education. Straight from the airport, she was taken to the boys quarters of a main building with a well-manicured lawn that belonged to a Professor Harrison. In this cave-like 4×4 flushed painted room, were two well-used mattresses spread out on the terrazzo floor with a cheap blue bed sheet that’s probably seen better days due to constant washing with a local hand soap, and there it was, still struggling to cover the edges of the foam. Suitcases dragged to one corner and a make shift table with piles of empty boxes in the middle of the room.

“Where exactly will I be sleeping? – Omolara rolled her eyes and turned to Ayibari, her younger cousin who was now pretending to be fidgeting with her bag. “Well, Lara, hmmm, the thing is that, Ovie is not always…

To Be Continued…

Yinka 🙂