Life’s issues exhausting? ’Time to fix our eyes on…

/ Yinka (Anthonia) Gansallo-Lawrence

fixOur Emotions: Affection, Despair, Rage, Shame, Sentiment, Passion, Excitement, Pride, Remorse or Anger can be a great motivator in our lives and also a great enemy at other times.

According to Watchman Nee, author of Spiritual Discernment, “Emotions are the believer’s number one enemy – not the devil, but our emotions” That’s why we always need to have a sincere talk with our feelings and check-in with our mindset.

When we live our life emotionally exhausted, there’s no fun in it. Practically everyone I know growing up had dreams of great adventure, love-passionately, fun, family and friends, Right? If we take a look at our current lifestyle and consider how the reasons listed above has caused an emotional energy crisis in our life, then we can connect with the renewable resources that’s needed to fuel our emotional energy and plug up the leaks draining us. Certainly, we’ll feel better about ourselves, our relationships and our lifestyle.

About 23 years ago, I survived a horrific school riot. Myself and two other Polytechnic students managed to escape into a nearby bush and were rescued by an elderly villager who shielded us against the brutality of angry student-demonstrators and also harbored us from the more-angered mobile policemen arresting students on sight. We took solace alongside the villager’s jolly wife and their four children inside his un-completed 2-bedroom house, by the outskirt of Bori in Rivers State. No electricity or running water – we were so terrified and uncertain about our future and cried our hearts out every minute until we ran out of tears! But they treated us well, provided us food until the 2nd night when a vigilante team and police escort came by to rescue us and delivered us home safely.

That was one crazy –memorable period of my life. I was emotionally drained, demented and displaced! Myself and the other 2 students who escaped together, formed a special bond that’s made us best of friends since then. If a fly had mistakenly perched on my nose, I would ball into uncontrollable tears! literally! It was a messy emotional distraction! The effect/aftermath of the riot!

So, again I‘ve had to fight that forbearance battle! but this time around with my chin tilted up and the tears that came was to celebrate freedom of expression and not fear. My eyes were fixed on God’s purpose for me to learn from those challenging issues I couldn’t wish away, erase, rewind or wipe off with white out! But with grace, to press the play button and move forward instead.

Bouncing back, I realized that if we give God the reins of our heart, we’ll surely find stability. But then, we have to give Him all the reins or we’ll still be in danger of pulling in the wrong direction as we run our races. If we pick and choose which emotions we will submit to God and which ones we’ll allow free rein in our souls, we might still be unstable and wounded. We’ll end up holding on tight as the emotional roller coaster turns us upside down and leaves us spinning in circles.

Friendship breaks when it’s not nurtured, Family ties gets knotted when love is conditional, Marriages fail when we run out of the emotional energy to reach one more time across the divide of anger and silence. Dreams die when we kill the enthusiasm to hang in there and face all the obstacles that may come with it.

Today, I am encouraging someone reading this to Hit Rewind, Click Delete, and Stand Face To Face with whatever mistakes or heartbreak or emotional coaster they’re riding on. To be able to identify what made them feel emotionally exhausted and to say “NO MORE” to that which deplete them, so that they can create more space in their life for saying “OH YES” to that which fuels their spirit, soul and body. Here’s what I’d do differently… Focus on the play button and ‘Fix my eyes on God!

Yours in Hope as I share one of my favorite songs below.

Yinka 

 

14 thoughts on “Life’s issues exhausting? ’Time to fix our eyes on…”

  1. At a point, I began to wonder if this was a letter to me….so resonated with me and my person. But trust me, it’s not easy to let go of protecting yourself when you’ve been killed emotionally before…and through His Grace, you’re able to find some form of healing…
    God doesn’t come down from Heaven to direct us….He does that by guiding us through wisdom to learn & know how to identity the tell tale signs that sets off the alarm in our heads that it’s time to shield ourselves from being hurt again by another fellow human…
    I can say with my strongest conviction, “that deep emotional hurt is the worst hurt you can put anyone through…especially those who grew up knowing how to truly love… The deep sense of hurt, hopelessness and emptiness that comes from being deeply hurt and betrayed by someone you got deeply into your heart is something I don’t really think people fully recover from…maybe wrong, but that’s my view for now.
    Even when healed, the deep scar is always there to remind you…
    And if truly whatever didn’t kill us made us stronger, or if indeed the hardest metal is meant to pass through the hottest furnace in order to attain the very high level of resistance & strength needed from it, then maybe….and only maybe…it was God’s way of strengthening us up for bigger challenges ahead… And we may not have been able to float and sail through them if we learnt not to protect ourselves from eventual emotional hurt which would have had more devastating effect…

    Not to also say it’s best to live through life looking behind our back all the time as per the fear of being emotionally hurt again…

    But all said and done, It’s only naturally instinctive for a child to stay away from a fire after having been burnt once…

    So it’s all a lot more complex than it seems… And only if you’ve experienced such a hurt canl you be able to fully understand how devastating it can be on every aspect of one’s life…

    But remembered, its easier to say my God has put me through that furnace in order for me to acquire the wisdom I have now….which is shielding/guiding my every step from another bigger danger, than it is to say I am gonna jump high into the air and fly from the roof top….knowing fully well that the Lord God will either miraculously grow wings for me to fly…or he’ll step out invisibly and hold me in the air all through my flight…

    Very thought provoking write up… Just hope my reply isn’t longer than the main write up itself 🙂
    Thank you, Yinka.

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    • My dear Nerrymandis,
      Thanks for your heart warming outpour of emotion…you are not alone, believe me. We’ve all been in similar or almost about the same issues of the heart.

      One thing I know for sure is that because we cannot really avoid ‘falling in love” or “loving someone” again and again, even with the pain and misery that comes with it – then we might have to be wise and ready to accept some stones or thorns that comes with the bitter pleasure.

      But that’s not fair though! Again, we need to take the best out of any situation we find ourselves and hope for a better “next time”. We cannot say because love hurts or love burns then we have to stop living our lives, deprive ourselves from all the “other” beautiful things that could have been, we simply cannot give up on life or love or romance or leisure… we just need to pick up from where we left off… dust off from where it stinks, apply bandage to any open wound and move forward…

      I believe you are in a better place today – mentally, because you have chosen the path of “awareness” – You know your value and because you know what you can offer on your side, you wouldn’t want to be taken for granted again – ever… I know, we all say this….Even I do…

      But the truth is…we just need to be able to pick out battles…and fight it accordingly…

      Do not give up on LOVE just because a mistake’s been made. Do not turn away from whatever is left of life, do not be skeptical to be vulnerable- to exist.

      Our scars (visible or hidden) is just a reminder of what could have been…good or bad! It should be seen as that prompter that dictates how to emerge from boiling water – not escape from it.

      I know it is easier said than done… but do open up to a new season of hope…reach out again and begin to embrace love… let go of whatever or whoever has made the path difficult for you in the past… Forgiveness is for US the hurting one, not the culprit.

      There are days am asking myself…oh God, how do you expect me to just let it go, just like that” but its only for my own SANE mind to do it.

      I feel you, I hear you loud and clear, I am holding you close to my heart, and am trusting God for a turnaround with you.

      After we’ve been pushed to the extreme of the walls, and there’s no where to go. That’s when God picks us up to rise and shine again.

      That’s the beginning of great things to come.
      ‘much love..
      Yinka.

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